“You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you still remember dreaming? That’s where I’ll always love you. That’s where I’ll be waiting.”
~Winnie The Pooh
My mother loved to garden. She had a strong spirit, and when the doctors said she wouldn’t make it through the night 4/29/13, she passed at 3:33 am on May 1st, my siblings and I were convinced was to prove them wrong, that she was always on God’s time.
May Day, a day of springtime celebration and flowers. That night we needed fresh air; I stepped outside the hospital and sat in a bed of tulips and cried while my brother took long drags from his cigarette. We were powerless as the reality of the outcome was setting in. My brother couldn’t save her. I couldn’t heal her. It really was in divine timing.
After she passed, we went to our hotel, me, my two older sisters and older brother. We were finally able to sleep. I tossed and turned and got up while my siblings were asleep around 6 am. I made my way to the continental breakfast making myself eat. As I sat down I saw a photograph above me of cherub angels, around a fountain and bright pink and red tulips. That’s so mom, I thought. I took my coffee back to the patio of our room and called my aunt to relay the sad news. As she spoke, I gazed at the empty flower bed in front of me where two isolated red tulips were peaking through the soil. I recognized the synchronistic connection but dismissed it in my grief. When my siblings woke up, we made our way back to my mother’s house where her long-term partner Gary was there to greet us with open arms. My brother and I had made it just before my sisters arrived and cried in his arms. In an attempt to cheer us up, he said, I have to show you something in your mother’s garden. He pointed out the kitchen window to her flower bed, see that flower over there? It just bloomed this morning. I walked with him outside and saw yet another isolated red tulip. My mother, a gardener had tulips and flowers of all types and colors. OK this is getting weird I thought as I told Gary and my siblings about the tulips I saw earlier that morning. When my brother and I got back to Denver we had to tell his two daughters, my nieces the news. This was heartbreaking to tell two little girls. In an attempt to cheer them up I told them the tulip story. Their eyes lit up through their tears saying “we planted that one with Grandma last Summer. The rest were pink.” My sister, who worked on a cruise ship sent a picture to us a few days later of an isolated red tulip she saw during her journey. When the time came, I went back to work right away. A coworker gave me a ride home one evening, and as I got out said, “I almost forgot! My pastor gave me this, but when he handed it to me I saw your face.” She handed me a red tulip garden votive. I couldn’t believe it. No one at work knew. A couple of years later I decided to plant some flowers in honor of her on May 1st. and went to a garden store. Before going in, I asked her to give me a sign. Inside, was an arrangement of pink tulips surrounded one red tulip. It happens so often now, I say hi mom. I love you.
This is how spirit speaks to us, and how our loved ones can and will make connection. The more you acknowledge these signs, the more your loved ones will know to communicate them to you. As my mother used to say, when love goes away, it always comes back to us in another form.
So for this month, I’d like to challenge you to ask your loved ones in spirit to give you signs, and when they appear, trust them, knowing the veil is thin and we’re really still part of the whole.
Today, I’m happy to say, I am able to celebrate this time of year in her honor and smile, knowing she’s with me.
Loads of love,